Rooted ReflectionsThoughts & meaning
CBT and psychodynamic ideas help us notice thoughts, assumptions, past experiences, and deeper meanings that shape how each partner responds.
Couples counseling online
“The relationship is the client.”
- John Gottman
I am not here to decide which partner is right. I work with the relationship, the patterns between you, the wounds underneath them, and the skills that can help you find your way back to yourselves and each other.
Email and text are not crisis services. If you are in immediate danger or experiencing a mental health emergency, call 911 or 988.
Communication is a skill you can practice
Many couples have never been taught how to communicate through emotional intensity. You may love each other and still struggle to slow down, listen actively, show empathy, or say what you really need without attacking, defending, or shutting down.
Learning a new way to communicate can feel like learning a second language. That is valid. It is a process that takes practice and builds over time. In session, we will explore the strengths and struggles that come up in your relationship while practicing and building these skills in real time, preparing you for hard conversations outside of session and beyond.
Couples therapy can also help you see your partner through a more positive lens, reconnect, and learn again how to both love and like your partner as they are today. Communication work includes learning to show up for yourself, speak your needs clearly, and set direct boundaries without trying to control one another.
A deeper look at the work we will do together
I draw from several therapy approaches and use what fits the relationship in front of me:
Emotional regulation
DBT-informed skills help you work with emotional intensity, regulate your nervous system, and stay present enough to communicate.
Parts & protection
IFS-informed work helps us approach protective parts with curiosity and understand what they are trying to prevent or secure.
Attachment wounds
Attachment theory helps us make sense of the dance between reaching, withdrawing, protesting, pursuing, and protecting.
Conflict patterns
Gottman-informed work helps identify criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling, the Four Horsemen, and practice healthier alternatives.
Reconnection
We bring these pieces together so you can create more safety, empathy, repair, and intentional connection.
Affirming, secular care
I am queer-identifying and offer affirming care for LGBTQ+ couples, trans partners, polyamorous relationships, consensual non-monogamy, and kink-positive relationships. I am here to show up with you in the way you need, regardless of societal expectations.
My work is nonreligious and secular. If spirituality matters to you, we can explore it through your own lens without imposing a belief system.
Fees and flexible session length
$50per 15-minute unit, private pay only
Choose the number of units you need for that day, based on availability. For example: 45 minutes is $150, 60 minutes is $200, and 90 minutes is $300.
Insurance is not accepted for couples therapy.
What online sessions offer
Telehealth lets you meet from the privacy of your own home without adding travel time to an already full week. Clients must be physically located in Iowa or Missouri during the session. Each partner receives their own login and link, and partners may join from two separate private locations if needed.
Email and text are convenient ways to make initial contact, but they are not crisis services. If you are in immediate danger or experiencing a mental health emergency, call 911 or 988.
I believe in your capacity for growth and connection.
When both partners want to take part, change is possible. Start with a brief message and tell me whether you are located in Iowa or Missouri.
Email and text are not crisis services. If you are in immediate danger or experiencing a mental health emergency, call 911 or 988.